Hello managers,
Now that we’ve seen the first pair of World Cups, it’s
time to update the
Crappy Tire Power Rankings.
For the pre-season
edition, Dad didn’t have many inputs other than vibes. Now that we have some
actual results to base these rankings off, you should expect some pretty big
swings here or there. For example, Dad didn’t expect Damian Zurek to be the second
coming of Jesus Christ. Dad also expected Marijke Groenewoud to know how to
speed skate. Turns out life is full of surprises.
I didn’t have time to include it today, but I’ll be
back soon with an update to the Free Agent and Injury Trackers. Also, just a quick
reminder that I’ll update the rankings after every pair of World Cups as well
as after the Olympics.
Crappy Tire Power Rankings – World Cup 2
Update
The Stars Have Aligned
1 Max (+5)
2 Christian
(-1)
We don’t usually get one or two totally standout teams
this early in the season, but the stars really do seem to be aligning for our
top two ranked teams. First off, they both have Femke Kok (this is likely going
to be the main key to success this season). Second, their second-round picks
(Leerdam and Wiklund) are off to really solid starts. Compare this to a bunch
of other picks in the first two rounds (for example: Takagi, Han, Groenewoud,
Ghiotto, Nuis, Min-Sun, Dubreuil, or McLeod) and you can imagine how much
harder hitting the top 1-2 punch on these two teams is. Third, throw in a
smattering of skaters performing above expected so far (Lee Na-Hyun, Sonnekalb,
Lamarche, Maltais, Bowe, Morozova) and you’ve suddenly got a recipe for an
incredible season. At this point I’m expecting the league winner to be one of
these two teams.
Top Cheddar
3 Simon
(-1)
4 Paul+Anna
(+18)
5 Dylan
(-1)
6 Matt Z
(+2)
7 Jordan
8 MCV
(+13)
9 Abby
(+14)
It’s only the first update to the Power Rankings and
we’ve already got a shuffling of the deck. Four teams that we knew were really
good have been joined by three teams that blew right by
The Chase
all
the way from
The Pack.
A lot can change in a matter of weeks—especially
if you have Femke Kok, Casey Dawson, Timothy Loubineaud, Beatrice Lamarche, or
Finn Sonnekalb. All these skaters put on a bit of a show over the first two World
Cups, especially those who earned any sort of track record or world record
bonus points. If any of these skaters start cooling off (like, for example, if
Timothy Loubineaud stops averaging 31 points per race in the 5000m), then we
can expect a few of these teams to start sliding down the rankings again.
On a side note, it wouldn’t be another year of fantasy
speed skating if I didn’t seriously misjudge both Paul+Anna and MCV’s teams. I’m
not sure that I’ve ever had MCV anywhere remotely near the top of my pre-season
rankings, and yet somehow they keep finishing somewhere up there by the end of
the season. Sounds like a bit of a me problem…
The Chase
10 Ryan
(+16)
11 Bon
(+8)
12 Joel+Josh
(+12)
13 Sam (-10)
14 Ian
(-4)
15 Reece
(-2)
16 Zach
(+2)
17 Thomas
(-3)
18 Shawna+Kathy
(+10)
19 Daniel
(+18)
These are all quite good teams and should mostly hit
at least 2000 points by the end of the season—a very respectable fantasy speed
skating points haul. Some of these teams are also quite likely to displace a
few teams above them and start inching into the money, though it’s still hard
to tell which of these ten teams has had a lucky start and which teams are built
on a more durable foundation.
Shoutout to Daniel for climbing through a couple of
categories all the way from the
Emin Chasers
to on of our three most
elite groups. And also shoutout to Stepdad for going back to his old model and
still managing to disappoint Dad. My hopes were so high, but now they’ve
settled back down to a height that might be familiar to someone like Joey Mantia.
I’m starting to think that Stepdad, the dirty old drunk, is just not that good
at fantasy speed skating. Surely he (and his “model”) should have known that
Miho, Fish, Dubreuil, and Swings were destined to spend some quality time stuck
in B Division. And, if you think that’s an unfair claim, I’d love to hash it
out over a couple of Old Milwaukees.
The Pack
20 Charlotte
(-9)
21 Taylor
(-12)
22 Connor
(-7)
23 Greg+Sofia
(-6)
24 Cody
(-19)
25 Kiersten+Hayleigh
(-5)
26 Matt L
(+4)
27 Eric+Emil
(-2)
28 Erik (+4)
29 Adam
(+6)
30 Cooper
(+9)
31 Garrett
(+7)
The
Pack
is truly at
a crossroads. The top half if this group is teams heading the wrong way down
the rankings, some even from as high up as 7
th
in the pre-season rankings.
The bottom half of
The
Pack
is mostly teams on the way up, some
from the very depths of Hell (aka right around wherever Darius was ranked at
the start of the season). Will the top teams in this group turn things around
before it’s too late? Most of them have some big multi-distance hitters who
could really rake in the points at the Olympics and World Champs, but the clock
is ticking. If Lollobrigida and Groenewoud wait too long to start earning their
teams some serious points, a finish in the money won’t be a likely bet.
Playing to Lose
32 Lindsey
(-16)
33 Rachel
(-4)
34 Emma+Darby
(-3)
35 Peter+Brooke
(-8)
None of these teams can say they’ve had much of a
satisfactory start. They mostly came out of Draft Night with some underwhelming
rosters. Now, two weekends in, their teams are somehow failing to meet even the
lowest of expectations. That being said, these teams are admittedly better
looking that the true scum of the earth that you can find in the next category.
Carelessness at this point could be costly though, as there is still room to
drop. A nifty free agent pickup or two (or maybe even just keeping the best
possible skaters active on the right weekends) should be enough to hold of the
truly bad teams and might even be enough to claw back up into
The Pack
.
Emin Chasers
36 Jenna
(-24)
37 Darius
(+3)
38 Robert
(-2)
39 Nick
(-5)
40 Jack
(-7)
I gotta say, there are some pretty incredible surprises
down here. The most obvious one might appear to be Jenna who dropped a whopping
24 spots from a near-the-money preseason ranking all the way to the bottom of
our depth chart. But honestly, Dad is most surprised to see Darius not ranked
last. If you’re currently losing to a team that selected Greta Myers and Anders
Johnson in their top 5 and also happens to have Connor Howe, the Pride of Uzbekistan,
and the World Cup Circuits oldest participant, then shame on you.
Racing resumes this coming Friday in Heerenveen with
World Cup 3. This means that
any roster changes need to be submitted by
11:59 PM Mountain Time on Thursday, December 4
th
. Still lots of
season left to earn points, so even if your team is in the gutter you should
still try to put the right skaters on the bench this weekend and maybe even
consider picking up a free agent or two. Lots of time left to climb back into
the top ten to earn some money!
Cheers,
Dad